Sunburnt on Sunday, June 27, 2004
I was so excited when i realised that the national service had been cut by 2 months! Nobody outside the national service will ever understand the kind of exhiliration and relief we nsf feel. Hey, we are going to be civilians earlier by 2 months!
I was trained in basic military training in Tekong, i was trained to become a specialist in tekong, i was an instructor in tekong training recruits. Some of my buddies would have sneered or scoffed at the kind of mishap i have landed up in, to spend my national service in the stupid military island. However in my opinion, i beg to differ. Though i dun really come to terms with some of the management within my company and other various standing orders, i have this sense of belonging with my bunk, my office, my colleagues, even recruits at times. For years, i will be staying in my bunk, every single day doing almost the same things, entrusted with almost the same responsiblities...If the day i become a civilian arrived, i am at loss of what i should do. My life will be void of events, of responsibilies. Communal living in the army build up a sense of bond in friendship too. We share joys, frustrations, anger and learn how to tolerate one another too. This is something i have might not be able to learn from a civilian life. If i touch my heart to tell the truth, i think i am really going to miss tekong.
The other side to the coin is that army let you see a mulitude of "character-flawed" people. Not that i am thick-skinned enough to consider my infallible, but i do encounter who seriously need some anger management course, perhaps from a teacher called Adam Sandler.
A song goes..."desperado, why don't you come to your sense". People in the army never come to their senses. They are 2-timers, they are sexually active, they go around preying and cruising for pretty gals. Looks are their first priority in seeking long-term relationships. Why are all these happening inside the army. I do agree that it might have become a norm in the army, but i seriously dun succumb to these stands. I dun think "love at first sight" is always happening. You will love a person when you have known he or her well enough to admire the traits and beauty in handling situations in life. I never deny the fact that looks do play a role somehow or rather, but that is always a bonus on top of a mesmerizing inner beauty.
I think that in the eyes of the civilians, army guys are depicted as sexually deprived, ill-mannered, ungentlemanly bunch of brutes. At least i am not. :)
Nick was out in the sun at
hey shicai here : ) didn't know ya got blog. Can link me up? thanks : )
By 
PrataKosong, at
11:14 AM
i am very very frustrated today. First and foremost, the journal i had juz written was gone due to some stupid popup. I hate popups!!!
I wrote a pretty long one, about my thoughts on church and life, about how church has evolved to become a home for Pharisees. Just look at "city harvest". A church, to my meagre knowledge, is never meant to be so people-oriented. I dun really fancy people who got so carried away when they worship God that they have to fall down on their knees, gabbering in some so-called "tongues", throw their hands up in the air in exhiliration. I prefer a kind of quiet worship, where it is a peaceful, tranquil, serene, whatever you call it, personal experience to praise the Lord for the things around you, so as not to take people or things around you for granted.
Each one of us has this vaccum in us. Science, sex, and achievements in life sometimes dun answer to this need that we have. We want to believe that there is God, in order for miracles to happen, in order for someone sick to be up and kicking happily, in order some mistakes you have made in life to be reversed. When i was in sec3, some stranger on the street share to me about God. I was curious then. I met up with that guy a couple of times who later became my Bible teaching teacher. I was kinda fascinated how much though-provoking tenets were inside this small little book. I was amazed at how the values relate to me in life. i do believe that all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, i do believe in one God who is omnipotent and omniscience. I went to attend Church after that...
A year after that, i feel so drained of my energy, having to attend youth fellowship and foundation classes on saturday and sunday sermon. My weekend is burnt "for God sake". Every sunday before the sermon, people sitting beside you will ask you to share something God had enlightened you this week. Sometimes you juz have nothing to share..sometimes you are distracted by issues in you life, sometimes you juz dun feel like talking to that guy next to you. Sometimes i am juz tired. The worse to come is when church organise outreach events, and they have to make a big publicity via street evangelism, or by giving the pamplets.
I have not been attending church for almost 2 years. i feel that i can't have that commitment to attend church, to follow the teachings. People will say.."juz pray that God will give you the determination"..so cliche. .
Churches now have evolved to become a fashion statement for teens. Years down the road, dun be suprised to see CHCC membership card holderships. City Harvest Church Club. Pastors can sing, so i dun see a reason why this can't happen.
Nick was out in the sun at
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