Sunburnt on Friday, December 31, 2004
For the past 2 days i had been staying at home...slacking away, and seriously not sure of how to help my mum....
She seems so busy and yet i am slacking...i am so bad hor...
My brother got me a pair LEVI's jeans which i am happy to receive...(duh)
Anyway i am still thinking of wat to get for my brother's birthday...
Tmr will a busy day for me and my whole family...really thankful for my mum's enthusiasm... :)
Nick was out in the sun at
Recently i make it a point to do 100 crunches everyday, sometimes exceeding that. I wan to do 100 push-ups too, but my seemingly scrawny arms seem to fail me. Thus i decided to work on my abs first. THough there had been some subtle toning of my torso, but i am never satisfied.
I was thinking of whether protein powders and weight gainers actually aid me in retaining muscle strength and the rate of recovery.
THe doubt came in the form of side effects. Hmm well i am not that sure.
Never trespass on an unknown boundary....
Frens had told me to eat 2 bananas and milk every morning and i think i should try doing that from now onwards. Being an ectomorph, i have pretty high basal metabolic rate. Thus i think i muz eat more carbo-protein food and at the same time exercise more.
The 100 crunches had made me lose weight....2 kg...which make me speechless. I don't wan to lose weight, i wan to gain weight!
I tell myself to eat more in between meals, not junk food of coz.
May be i should consult my obese recruits for this.
Perhaps i may view this as a bane, but ppl are so envious of me, that i can lose weight automatically without exercising....
NOt good not good....unhealthy u know...
There was once i told my fren i am very petite, and he stared at me with a funny look and said "halo, petite sounds so feminine, u should juz say slender, slim, lean or scrawny..."
After pondering over it, i realise he was true...petite does sound abit feminine..haha
Nick was out in the sun at
Sunburnt on Thursday, December 30, 2004
I dream of one day being able to travel to places of my interest. European countries, especially, or Australia, with someone you love.
Probably that will happen when i am married? When i am spending my honeymoon? WHo invented this idea anyway, that after u get married u will go for a "honeymoon"?
I feel that i am really compelled to follow the education system in singapore. To study for pragmatic gains, to get a well-earned job, to get settle down with a family, and yada yada family committments.
Muz life be in this pattern? Can't we juz thinking individuals think of something out of the mores and norms?
Whenever i am frustrated, i always like to sing or buy things i wan to buy, and not need to buy. I am fullly aware of the needs and wants. Yet sometimes i make the line between these 2 entity pretty thin.
Has army changed me for a better individual? Actually that question can only be answered by my family members and buddies.
I become skeptical of systems like the ISO, the SUperbrands. I realise that all these are juz "WAYANG", meaning that all these systems does not necessarily represent what the workers and staff really feel.
Though it is an indubitable fact that the system does bring about a standard set of procedures which bring about productivity and results, this procedures muz be concurred by all members of the workforce.
If otherwise, workers will juz grumble, follow through the motion with no conviction, leading to unhappy robots filling up those empty job posts.
Nick was out in the sun at
I saw pictures of Indian parents wailing for their lost children. I saw the waves crashing to the beaches. But i seriously dun wish to read much into the reports in the papers. I know that the reports will juz give the litany of details, the death tolls as of updated, the upcoming predictable aftermath of that catastrophe.
Perhaps many of us think that we are sheltered in Singapore, that the seismic waves were buffered by the major continents surrounding us. I think that somehow or rather the economy in singapore will definitely be affected. This had been the most disastrous calamity in 40 years. What exactly had triggered that?
I rememeber studying about the tectonic plate movement in geography lessons in secondary school. I remember memorising tons of texts about the various kinds of plate movments. NOw that it seems so real, especially when the thought of a 4- storey high wave came crashing down onto you with a force of a speeding vehicle on an expressway is so unfathomable, that i seriously refuse to believe such a thing actually happen.
THe maldives islands are always low-lying. I am pretty sure they muz be almost flooded with water, or waves now.
Juz as i am enjoying my life, blogging away, there are ppl suffering on another parts of the world.
That is juz how ironic the world is, isn't it?
I heard from my dad that the grandson of the thai king was washed off by the waves while playing by the beach...sad..huh?
Nick was out in the sun at
Sunburnt on Wednesday, December 29, 2004
I went to watch Kung Fu Hustle yesterday evening with Lim teh. The movie was indeed an entertaining one. I am quite suprised that there are people who find it a nonsensical movie with crappy development in the plot.
If life is always that serious, where on earth can u derive pleasures out of simple stuff?
The movie might be a "no-brainer" film, but the fact that it can make me laugh all my guts out make it a watchable show.
Stephen Chow obviously had not escaped the clutches of time. He has aged, with some less conspicuous lines defining the sides of his eyes. It became apparent to me that he had to make comedy or act in comedies to re-define his life, to carve out a new meaning for him. In reality he seems to be someone full of crestfallen stories to tell.
The last time i watched a movie that is so entertaining is White Chicks! HA HA HA, beyond any words. However, white chick is fillled with intelligent adult jokes, which i think my little brothers might find it hard to appreciate. He might juz laugh at their actions and behaviors rather than wat they converse about.
" I haven seen you like, ..forever!"
Movies help me indulge in a niche which is my comfort zone, an arena for me to explore adventures, to explore new ideas, to give all my senses a wonderful joyous treat.
Nick was out in the sun at
Grew up in a small town
And when the rain would fall down
I'd just stare out my window
Dreaming of what could be
And if I'd end up happy
I would pray
Trying hard to reach out
But when I tried to speak out
Felt like no one could hear me
Wanted to belong here
But something felt so wrong here
So I'd pray
I could break away
I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly.
I'll do what it takes till I touch the sky.
Make a wish, take a chance,
Make a change, and break away.
Out of the darkness and into the sun.
But I won't forget all the ones that I love.
I'll take a risk, take a chance,
Make a change, and break away
Wanna feel the warm breeze
Sleep under a palm tree
Feel the rush of the ocean
Get onboard a fast train
Travel on a jetplane
Far away
And break away
I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly.
I'll do what it takes till I touch the sky.
Make a wish, take a chance,
Make a change, and break away.
Out of the darkness and into the sun.
But I won't forget all the ones that I love.
I'll take a risk, take a chance,
Make a change, and break away
Buildings with a hundred floors
Swinging with revolving doors
Maybe I don’t know where they’ll take me
Gotta keep movin on movin on
Fly away
Break away
I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly.
Though it’s not easy to tell you goodbye
Make a wish, take a chance,
Make a change, and break away.
Out of the darkness and into the sun.
But I won't forget the place I come from
I gotta take a risk, take a chance,
Make a change, and break away
Breakaway
Break away
Nick was out in the sun at
I am juz being punished with 3 times extra duties....i am nonplussed. I hate my encik for being so unreasonable. The IDSM is quiet about what had happened, the SSM too is quiet. So in wat way can he be so full of angst and fury to mete that punishment to Liu and i.
When i was in the office with liu today, both of us stood like 2 statues, bearing that force of evil aura emanating from that black dog.
I always think that my encik, being an Indian and corpulent in build, is a shapeshifter. In tekong island, there are many dogs, and i am sure one of those were him in disguise.
He kept shouting at the 2 of us, he swearing at us, as if his mouth is a wind hole, where loathsome words keep gushing out, with breaknecking force and thunderous roar.
I am never beaten by this kind of scolding. YOu, yes you (encik), can go ahead and scream ur words into me, or try to show me that you are the one taking charge over here, but never forget that i am a soldier who had done wat is enough for the saf, who is going to leave the island soon. Probably much to his oblivion, i can't be bothered, though this incident had been lingering on my mind. I juz wanna serve the extra duties as soon as possible so that my ord leave will not be touched..or affected for that matter.
I seriously feel no sense of patriotic love for the army. It sucks to the core, to the mantle to the crust.... may the TSUNAMIS as tall as TAKASHIMAYA drown him.
Nick was out in the sun at
Sunburnt on Monday, December 27, 2004
I am an extremely slow reader. That is why i prefer to buy than borrow books. When i buy books i can take my time to digest the new words, the contents, rather rushing to skim thru the story.
I have a fren who seems to share quite a similar interest with me. Whenever i go to kino, or borders looking for some good books, i came upon a few which she had already read.
You probably will question how i define as good books. First of all i go for those that are being displayed in a very conspicuous position, next the cover, followed by the blurb.
I can be pretty bored by books which go into litany of details and description. I am to be blamed for being so superficial. I read more into what is going on than how the writer made known the emotions behind those words.
I came upon a novel in mph yesterday with a review from the washington post right on the cover which says, "better than the Da Vinci code".
Do ppl actually write such comments which sounds so spiteful?
Nick was out in the sun at
Sunburnt on Sunday, December 26, 2004
i love her!! 
Nick was out in the sun at
Friends who have all become civilians.....
Nick was out in the sun at
Takashimaya
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Village
Nick was out in the sun at
Inuyasha
Nick was out in the sun at
Today is boxing day. I have decided to stay at home to rot.
I had juz watched "The Village" for the third time. However i enjoyed watching it juz as much. I was explaining to my brother the intricacies behind the plot, the rationale for some of the actions of the elders in the village.
Many ppl detested the outcome of the story. Audiences were looking forward to a real creature living inside the woods. Similarly i was also one of them.
Much to my suprise, instead of disappointment, there was a conspiracy going on.
Much to my exhiliration was the love that bound Lucius and Ivy. The conversation on Ivy's pouch in the night, the indomitable Ivy who insist to cross over to the woods.
HIs father said, the world moves with Love, all kneel before love. That was the driving force which leads Ivy to her destination.
Does this kind of love exist in our era?
Nick was out in the sun at
Sunburnt on Saturday, December 25, 2004
I am wide awake. The luring of the monstrous slumber shall come pretty soon.
In a few more days and the year 2005 will arrive right into my life. What suprises could there be awaiting me?
Turning 21 soon, but are there really added responsibilities?
A life in solitude doesn't always mean a life of ennui. Sometimes i prefer to do things alone, then i could forget about having to please any person i am fond of.
Life should juz be filled with simplicities, instead of complicated affairs that never hesitate to impede you from contemplation from mistakes committed.
I am happy that i was not born with a silver spoon. My parents are never that highly educated. It was through an normal average family that i learn to appreciate what i have in life.
I may not be able to own a sleek and well-designed 3G mobile phone, i may not be able to dine in posh restaurant each i time i went out, i may have to get a bank loan in order to study in a local uni, but i have parents who love me, despite the constant nagging to be less extravagant with my spending.
My parents know me inside out, jus like some clothes that they are wearing. They know what are my favourite foods, they my choice of music, they know that i am a vain pot, and they always supported the way i sing, falsetto.
I think that is enough.
Day to day. i see ppl owning things that i wish i could have. Yet i was praying to the Lord to help me overcome that craving, or obsession with inanimate objects that only serve to entertain you without much gain in fact.
Ppl at my age crave for things, esp latest techonological gadgets, yet i seriously wish i could get out from these trends which eventually will become a passe.
Singing has most of the time makes me a more calm person. I often make rash decisions which derive terrible consequences.
THough i was never able to afford to catch any musicals, but i was glad there is such a thing called "soundtracks". The songs sometimes paint a story for me to hear....
I am really going to catch the phantom of the opera....However, there is seemingly no teens of my age who would love to appreciate movies with musical themes.
Think i should catch some sleep now.
Nick was out in the sun at
Sunburnt on Friday, December 24, 2004
I can't wait for kelly clarkson's latest album to be released. I heard that it will be out on the christmas.
Things i want for christmas:
Dumbells
Digi cam
Laptop
Whole range of biotherm or clinique skin care products
All my fav albums: Simple plan(welcome to my life), stacie orrico(stuck), alter bridge, fantasia, diana decarmo, ...etc
Free spa treats
Swiss ball
clothes....(jackets)
new handphone...
Cologne(kenzo)
Shopping voucher
shoes(for running;asics)
a temp job(1500 salary)
frames for all my platoon pics
Nick was out in the sun at
JUst realised that i am inviting about 50 + ppl to my house on the 1st of january. I was pretty much into going thru the motion. I wonder what will be my role on that day. I was the host, i am in the limelight, but i haven really got so many guests in my house b4.
There are juz too many temptations these days. Frens i have who live an elite lifestyle, who do not have to worry about anything pertaining to things they need or even want.
I never look down upon myself or my family for that matter. I treasure the kind of simplicity i have in my life.
I am grateful to God for a family i have, that i got enough to eat, and even to spend on leisure activites.
Ppl say that i am a vain pot, and i muz admit that i am really one, haha. I guess for me personal grooming and social etiqutte is pretty important to leave an indelible impression on others.
Ppl say that guys shouldn't be so vain, or he would land himself under the "metrosxual" category, which is often used to descibe the homos.
I can't be bothered with what ppl say. Who is to fix the rule that guys can't maintain a clean and appealing image. That includes what u wear too.
I was never born with a "perfect skin" genetics inside me. This awareness makes me want to take good care of my skin. Environment versus genes, isn't it?
Today is Christmas eve, and i am going out for a dinner later. Hope to catch the phantom of the opera or the kung fu hustle today. Lets juz say hopefuly.
Nick was out in the sun at
Sunburnt on Thursday, December 23, 2004
In about 3 months' time, i will be leaving tekong island, leaving that bunk of mine, leaving kilo. I am not really that sad, or reminiscent of those past memories. But i sometimes juz wonder at the amazing speed of time.
Standing on the hull of the ferry, my colleagues and i were back from some gathering with my upper study who had orded(became civilians). We had a dinner buffet at the breeks at marina, and i was left with a huge tummy, filled with an assortment of "junk". As i was saying, we were at the hull, letting the night sea breeze blow on our faces, our arms, indulging in that night scene that was filled with absolute pulchritude. Usually, my mates came out here to catch a few puffs, but i was here juz to look around. It was nice to see the mainland ferry terminal slowly disappear from sight and the trail of waves left behind by that ferry we were on.
I was thinking about the upcoming birthday buffet, about the upcoming basic theory test, about the kind of part-time job i should get myself in.
Nick was out in the sun at
Sunburnt on Tuesday, December 14, 2004
Once u stepped out of the ferry, u land on a platform with a path that leads you to entrance to Pulau Tekong. The sign reads, "welcome to Pulau Tekong". To many parents and civilians who first come with their enlisted children during their enlistment, the sign seem to innocuous. However, many nsfs who are working Tekong island have come to see that sign with contempt and mockery. "welcome", what a ironic greeting.
Having been posted to bmtc as an instructor, i have taken as of now 4 batches of recruits. The life of an instructor in Tekong can be pretty mundance, but we have grown to find our own source of entertainment.
First and foremost we have our Tekong mall, which is situated at the instructors' bunk. One the bunks had a dvd player, with loads of vcds and dvds, which my colleagues will play almost every night. We called that room Eng Wah. My room has stereo speakers which blast music everyday, to songs of R&B nature. We call that our music junction. The bunk next to mine had a super duper disgusting stench which when one open the door, he will not hesitate to slam the door close. We call that our "Scent shop". Last but not least we have a bunk who whole day long play PS2 games, and we call that bunk none other than the "arcade".
As you can see, life for instructors in tekong can be pretty fun, often oblivious to the naive recruits. Recruits are always recruits. They will exclude and deprive of any privileges which we can solely enjoy.
Second source of entertainment is that as instructors, we like to disturb our recruits. Whenever they see us, they will "DIAM"!" and greet us, follow by the permission for them to carry on. However i have added something before they can carry on, that they must report to me how many days i have left before i ORD. Hmmm, that will be fantastic isn't it. Recruits can really do silly things can times. SAF repellent, a green tube of transparent gel that stinks, SAF camouflage cream, green or darl brown. .... on one fine night.......something happened.
"Recruit Benjamin, why is your face so black...charcoal black?" shouted a sarge into his head.
It was in the dawn, on a day of the SIT test, the situation test for dipl/a level students. Recruit Benjamin dapped his face with his fingers, and look at his hands. Truly his hands were stained with black camou cream. As he tried to recall, he came upon a fatal realisation. The night before, the camp site was swarming with sand flies which bites can be irritatingly itchy. Recruit benjamin, being inside his basha(tent) in the middle of the night, delve into his pouches for his tube of repellent. He had mistakenly taken a black camouflage cream, happily applying to his face never to realise the embarrassment that he is going to go through the following day.
"Now everybody, i give you exactly ten minues, no, eight minutes to camou your face, and my time starts 2 minutes ago...." Bellowed a sergeant, with a sneering satisfaction on his face.
Out of a blue, i shouted at this particular recruit, recruit Ng.
" Oi Ng, what are you doing with that mirror?" I was so stunned that he brought a mirror to the field camp. NOt juz a mirror though. A round mirror, with a longitudinal handle at the bottom, with prints of flowery designs on the back.
" What the...f...., you think you are SADAGO is it? huh? " The rest of his platoon mates suddenly burst into fits of laughter. It was really unbelievable.
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My handphone line was being cut by m1, for the simple fact that my dad hadn't been paying the bill. As usual, i guess. I tell myself countlessly times that i am not going to be affected by any domestic "politics". However, i am not uncontactable by any single soul. Should i be worried, or relieved?
I am never as close to my dad then to my mum. My dad, being self-employed, leads a life of a typical taxi driver, who doesn't strive to earn much from his occupation. That is very bad of me to say, but i know that he hadn't being diligently driving around. Once in a while, i saw in his digital cameras, pictures of bars, pictures of some food exhibition, pictures of gals...etc. Of course, not pictures of him cuddling any gal.
I seldom talk to dad about much things in my life, unless i got to tell him when i am coming home from camp and yada yada stuff.
Every month, i have been paying 100 for the combined handphone bill that we had, with him being the main subscriber. Isn't that enough for a son to do, to contribute more that i ought to pay for the bill?
Sometimes i wonder what scenerio will arise once i step into the working world, and my parents start to grow old. Will they be like wat the drama series portray, always pestering you for the monthly allowances? Its not that i am those kind of person who is unfilial, or stingy to the point to extremity. However, nobody would like parents to keep pestering for more and more allowances. Right?
I love wat my parents had brought me up into. I thank God for my parents who have at certain points in my life, endeavour to give me watever i want. I love my mum for being such a great cook, who always feed me with delectatious delicacies.
Whenever i come home from my camp, my mum's dishes always fill me with exhilaration. You can imagine how bad army food can be.
I live to accept my parents' "gambling habits". The lottery and the mahjong sessions. I would never try to venture out into the world of gambling. Pretty addictive, coz i am tried before.
Brought up from a taoist cultural family, i have seen my parents leading me throught various funny cultural or religious rituals. That was before i accept Christ. My parents still practise ancestral worship, still believe in talking to the idols, asking for blessings.
My parents have come to realise my freedom to believe what i want to believe. They have ceased to strongly object "single-God" worship. I have refused gently to participate in their rituals, often juz accompany them to the temples. Sometimes i do pray that they too can realise the love of the God Almighty.
I never blame my parents for what they believe, considering the kind of childhood they brought up in, a traditional , conservative chinese family to succumb to all kinds of supernatural beliefs. Old wives' tales they say.
Whenever anybody's birthday is around the corner, it's time for the family to have a dinner, a sumptious one, occasionally with a birthday cake. One thing i have to admit though, i always find it very difficult to remember my parents' birth dates.
My mum sometimes like to lament about how she sometimes is so frustrated with my dad. Of how his attitude towards certain domestic affairs is so irritating, often on her nerves. My mum needs someone to always listen to her complaints. My siblings and i try to be there to listen, nodding our heads away, with "oh..", "ya"..."uh uh", to disguise our distraction.
Actually all i hope for this coming new year is that my family will always be safe and sound from any troubles, that they will always integrate together to solve any troubles in the near future.
Nick was out in the sun at
Sunburnt on Friday, December 10, 2004
My recruits passed out again. Having that as my 4th batch, i am numb to any nostalgic emotions. Seeing my recruits hugging one another, sharing the joy of having completed their bmt, i congratulate them silently in my heart.
Walking to the parade square with my other colleagues, my recruits started to lift us up and throw us into the air.
Back in tekong, rsm never allow the recruits to do that, apparently due to some past accidents of instructors landing on the ground. I couldn't imagine that happening.
Now in this combat unit, the men actually throw us up into the air. It was a very funny feeling, having to be in the middle of the air for a split second and back to the arms of your men.
As usual, there were flashes after flashes of photos being taken and hands were shaken, words of congratulation somehow automatically flow from my mouth.
After they were gone, i have to pack my stuff, to read myself to go back to bmtc. I am really going to miss this place, i told myself. 4 months spent here, months of forging friendships with my encik and oc, months of grumbling and complaints all to be gone at that moment.
I am in the ferry, together with that enormous heavy duffel bag, that really took my breath away while carrying it. Back in to my home sweet home, i was told the next enlistment was the following day. I told my oc that i am clearing my 5 day off. He told me to come back the following day to help out. I have no choice but to comply.
Time flies and here i am back at home, indulging in my breaks after taking a harsh monointake recruits.
I hate to make friendships and to go away from them. It was jus like in sispec bslc and aslc. Having made many good buddies who chiong sua and suffer together, i have to be posted to new places to make new frens. A man shouldn't be such a snag, some will say...
SNAG= sensitive new age guy.
I dun care, i am who i am. I dun live for ppl , i live for myself. As long there is accountability to my conscience, i have no worries.
Nick was out in the sun at
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